Hope

I now admit that I have hope that the Evil One may be at bay. I have been able to make every single day in June, without laxatives. My formula is this:

morning:
1 dose of powdered Citrucel in 500 mL warm water
full-day's dose of powdered probiotic in a small amount of water
3 TBS extra light olive oil

evening:
1 dose of powdered Citrucel in 500 mL warm water
3 TBS extra light olive oil

I make it my priority to void first thing after getting up. Sometimes it's within minutes, sometimes half an hour. But it's my duty. My doody.

I have a subjective, semi-logarithmic means of estimating output volume. It's a scale from '1' to '5.' Most days I make a '2.' A '4' is much more than twice the volume of a '2.' When I was constipated, I would make a '5,' and then some more later.

The Evil One was killing me, literally. It was the hammer, and the motor neuron disorder was the anvil. Every day that I am beyond the clutches of the Evil One is a blessing. I will continue my vigilant regime.

Given this new hope, I now remove from my blog header the words 太空所有的星球塞進我的屁股. They were copied from a Wikipedia list of curses from the science-fiction show "Firefly." Reader Scott recommended the show, and we watched the DVDs. Fun. They talk in English but curse in Chinese. The translation is "Stuff all the planets in the universe up my butt!" or "All the planets in outer space are stuffed up my butt!"

Now class, repeat after me...

"Taikong suoyou de xingqiu saijin wo de pigu!"