crying is okay. i have permission. but it's been happening a lot more since about the time i started taking an 'anti-anxiety' sleeping pill to get me to sleep in the bed rather than in the wheelchair. my whole personality is built around responding well to anxiety. i constantly fret, even at night ... which i have twisted into 'vision work.'. but if the pill removes that at night, then in the day, anything gets to me.

since i stopped using that pill, i think i've come out of it.