some people don't reveal their hurt at the time, but save up your words to throw back at you later. in the dorm, this nasty guy implied, repeatedly, that i had absconded with his twenty. he kept making his case, leaving the charge dangling. to shut him up, i kept saying 'i stole it.' he kept repeating his case, and i kept disputing all the 'facts' in his case. i was clearly disputing his conclusion, but each time he asked me what happened to the money, i would say i stole it. it went on forever. his 'case' hinged on the testimony of a friend of mine. i wrote the friend a note which argued that nasty guy's train of thought was stupid, and said that nasty guy -- not the friend -- must be an idiot. the friend did not deny, or stand by, his alleged testimony. at the end of the year, he said 'i save little notes that people write to me,' and he pulled out my note and read it back to me. as if i was supposed to be ashamed now. but it still made good sense, so i remained blasé. we are the brides of our words. after you say it, remember: you married him.