Thursday, January 15, 2004

There I thought I had had a good eating day. But two friends wrote me saying almost the same thing. I quote from one...

"...[N]o man has ever gained weight eating tofu and fruit. Your diet sounds like it should be in Glamour Mag's Seven Ways to Slim Down Before Summer article. You've been eating too healthy ... for so long you don't even notice that you're eating healthy and low fat.

If I may make a few suggestions:
Breakfast: Bagel with cream cheese and jam. Lots of it. Cup of tea with milk and honey.

Snack - Cheese and bread. Or hell, go ahead and eat the whole Toblerone.

Lunch - Hamburger with all the fixins. Potato salad. Big glass of Coke to wash it all down.

Snack - bowl of ice cream. Full Fat, please.

Dinner - Pasta with some kind of cream sauce. Some salad, but one with lots of avacado and a nice oil and vinegar dressing.

Dessert - anything sweet and high fat.

For added pounds, have two children and begin middle-aged sedentary lifestyle."

After I received this email I looked back at my day's gustation posting, and it seems pathetically twig-and-leafy. But I cannot easily undo my sin. First off, I am allergic to chocolate, in a way that has to do with the lactose intolerance. But I love bagels with cream cheese. And I do have two kids. And I am middle-aged. But not sedentary. Sorry, but 'sedentary' conjures 'atrophy' in my mind, so I'll stay active for now (heh heh!). I do love Italian pasta with cheesy sauces. And pesto is good too. Lots of olive oil. That's got to be good? Can I get a witness? But I stopped liking desserts when I was about 14 -- too sweet. I don't like ice cream: too sweet, and too cold. Hamburgers are delish, but if you have read Fast Food Nation you might not want to go to let the feedlot downers into your stomach. Avocados I love. Oh, my, yes, I do! The heck with the salad, I prefer raw spinach! Potato salad? OK, maybe, but I prefer macaroni salad (without the vinegar!). Coke. Feh! That's a ton of oxidizing poison. Sheesh. But I have toyed with the idea of drinking milkshakes. Although that does not appeal to me too awful much.

In summary, before the committee, I humbly apologize. I will endeavor to eat some fattier stuff soon.
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