Monday, April 30, 2007

the part you showed me around the peg, the pink part coming out ... hurts. please be gentle when cleaning it.

Sunday, April 29, 2007

when ronolulu visited recently, i threw a complete fit when a new night attendant showed up unexpectedly. last night an attendant who had been here once before dropped me. i fell lke a tree onto my back, my head smacking the floor inside the open closet. i was unharmed -- i think -- but my neck bones popped on impact. that was bad enough, but the struggle to lift me with the hoyer crane was worse, as my head was often bent forward so fiercely that my airway in my neck closed. i tried to protect myself by jamming my right fist under my jaw. naturally, they kept yanking my arm and hence fist away for the very 'important' purpose of lifting me with the harness.


many of you made good points in response to the raindrops problem, all of which i believe i thought of before posting.

some of you had misconceptions about the problem, to which i respond en masse by saying that i believe the problem was precisely, narrowly, and accurately crafted.

my answer is in bold above.

i welcome any valid explanation of my error.

Saturday, April 28, 2007

bills there
get chairput both .0aside
tell me each and amount

both aside


please help me create new p.0ayee
mark 'p' in new pile
is that a repeat
a bonus -- she good

Friday, April 27, 2007

from last week:

please remove my diaper and put in house trash because of smell

no new one


Thursday, April 26, 2007

one attendant said of my photo that i look like oscar de la hoya, 'that chisled look.' another said i look like gavin newsome.

but my opinion is: franz kafka mixed with rob lowe.

20 years ago i spoke to david halberstam. patrick was from an extremely well-connected family.

'hello, campus newspaper,' i said.
'yes, is patrick there?' said the gravely voice.
'who's calling please?'
'this is david halberstam.'

JFC! i thought. i told patrick he had a call on line one.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

usually in the day, i have kleenex in my teeth to absorb drool. but last night and the night before i was able to to swallow the saliva and hardly drool at all onto the towel. usually i soak it.

both times, my teeth, tongue and palate were brushed with listerine right before bed. my guess is that the drool is increased by bacterial irritation, and listerine reduces that.

this morning, i asked for the listerine again, and i have a dry towel on my chest and no paper in my mouth.

or it could be due to the doubling last week of the anti-saliva dose. or both.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

crying is okay. i have permission. but it's been happening a lot more since about the time i started taking an 'anti-anxiety' sleeping pill to get me to sleep in the bed rather than in the wheelchair. my whole personality is built around responding well to anxiety. i constantly fret, even at night ... which i have twisted into 'vision work.'. but if the pill removes that at night, then in the day, anything gets to me.

since i stopped using that pill, i think i've come out of it.

Monday, April 23, 2007

i had a dream last night that some star trek halloween display 'we' had set up had been vandalized. i knew in the dream that the whole story was a script. there were a group of african american kids at the top of a telephone pole. per the script, i approached them and asked about discrimination. "we're trying to find out if there is discrimination against star trek,"i said.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

yesterday i and the kids watched the 'star trek: generations' movie on my computer.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

please squirt two of these deeplyy, and squeeze hard and quick, in each nostril and let me sniff them us

Friday, April 20, 2007

my loving wife ands super sister did the work to hire three shifts so that i have 24-hour care

Thursday, April 19, 2007

36 comments are not enough. i think this blog has 50 readders. here is the lie from sitemeter:


Wednesday, April 18, 2007

this is part of a photo i took on 9/5/2002 while running with a buddy. it was sunny and hot, with distant clouds. we reached the top of a hill and raindrops fell on us, despite the sun. here's what i wanna know... (forget your credence clearwater revival): assume that the apparent diagonal pattern is truly diagonal within an ideal 4x4 grid [while writing this, i nearly fell out of my chair. only the side of my head against the keyboard sustained me long enough for my hero wife who i love to rush in and save me] ... and assuming a probability 'x' of a raindrop falling on a grid square during the brief shower before my photo, then what is the probability of the ideal diagonal occurring? if you read this blog, i DEMAND that you at least guess. aliases are required (e.g. magnetbabe), but be careful not to reveal your name, or email or web address in the comment. i know that some of you have knowledge of statistics, and i'll want you to check my guess, which i'll post when i darn well feel like it ... unless there are so few comments that i die choking on your heartlessness.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

i loved the Narnia books. but i said 'that last book is all abot how wonderful this stupid lion is.'

Monday, April 16, 2007

please observe how the saran is affixed to the keyboard, then put a new one on

saran is in itchen drawer -- childproof


Sunday, April 15, 2007

i was reading it and you mooved it. i fixed it and you moved it again.

three times you offered to open it

Saturday, April 14, 2007

my son is in the annoying game-tropic phase. i remember when i was.

Friday, April 13, 2007

yes, my incisors are loose. that's because i use an overbite to help me breathe. it's a jaw thrust.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

i drool constantly.

i cry several times a day, usually from neck or back pain, and also for release. try it. yesterday a talented friend from the old days arrived during my weepings. to show that i was unchanged, i wrote 'drink my drool.'

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

thrush clogged my airway march 14, brought on by dr. quack's antibiotics. i have stopped taking them. my MOST WONDERFUL sister arranged for night aides to care for me, to allow my dear wife to sleep.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

please try the forehead strap, but be GENTLE with my neck - - it hurts a lo t

do you need to move the furry thing?


pull it down a bit
thank you

Monday, April 09, 2007

good people often respond wrongly to my incomplete sentence on the message board. i will ask people to wait until i press 'code' button. like if i say 'no pillow' they think i'm responding to their 'do you want something?' with a 'no.'

Sunday, April 08, 2007

neck pain

Saturday, April 07, 2007

same deaj: ibu, 1 happt
kl in mith ps
before bedm suction. i;ll rise higher in bed b/c bad mucus today.

run more water iinto me to thin it, and use a diapr on m

need you at bedtime
tell her roofa bd A bou spray
catherine i am afraid
don't let me choke to dath
i ill do bed but i am afrai i'll wakechoking


Friday, April 06, 2007


I am so sorry that my nerve problem has robbed you of your dad. It just keeps getting worse. It might even make me die. That would be sad, but if it happens, I want you to remember me, and know that loving this family is the best thing I ever did.

I love you forever,


Thursday, April 05, 2007

we willlllllll need helpp for shower b ecayse i poop ed in diap e r

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

let's develop and practice a system where you hold the word page and i blink to go down one row, then blink twice quickly for correct row, starting a march across the columns, then blink twice quickly for correct item. if i hold my eyes closed for a while it means use the spell pad. if i make two eyes closed-for-a-while blinks it means quit the word pad and switch to 20 questions.

Monday, April 02, 2007

sometimes,, the heper IS the problem

Sunday, April 01, 2007

too tired to blog today
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